20 Jul 2011

When do I get to feel secure?

Abundance, Awareness, Inner Peace, Path & Purpose, Spirituality No Comments

When do I get to feel secure?

This question popped up in my mind during a conversation today.  It came from a specific internal struggle I’ve been working through, for… oh… I dunno maybe my whole life?  But definitely in the past year.

When do I get to feel secure?

At first it seemed a very valid (if whiny) question.

And then, it about sent me into peals of giggles.  What a RIDICULOUS question!!!  Especially because I KNOW the answer.  It’s a paradoxical answer.  Want to hear the answer?

It is both right now and never.

What?  How can that be true?

Right now… I can feel secure right now.  Of course I AM secure right now.  Duh.  Right?  Right now, I am totally secure.  In this now moment, I’m fine.  And even if not everything feels perfect, I’m fine.  I’m secure.  Done.  Duh.  So easy.  (The real answers are so often like that, aren’t they?  Bam!  It’s there.  It was there all along.  There’s no place like home…)

So yes, I can feel secure right now.  The Universe has my back.  And TRULY, right now, I’m secure.  Again, done.

Also, I can feel secure never.

Never?

Never.

Why is THAT?  In a way, security is death.  Wishing for security is to wish for sameness.  You want to know that things are not going to change.  That’s just not the way life is.  And when I really search inside my true heart and feelings and everything I’ve learned on my spiritual path… I don’t even WANT that kind of security.  It’s fuckin’ BORING!  Life is MEANT to be a grand adventure.  Life is meant to be LIVED, not planned.  It lives through us.  Letting life live through us and taking us where it may is the biggest gift.  When we are in a spirit of trust and security even without KNOWING where it’s going, we experience surprises, delights, wonder, and the sweetest bliss there is.

All we gotta do is trust in the benevolence of the all.  That’s simple, right?  Well, it can be.  But maybe if it doesn’t feel that way, just start with this moment.  Start to see benevolence in this moment.  And then look for it in the next moment.  And rest and relax into it.  Begin to see what happens.  Your awareness of the Benevolence around you will expand into every corner of your existence if you let it.  But just start where you are at.   All the security and adventure in the Universe rests in your own heart, if you let it.  And together, they are WOW.  Just wow.

Love to you, Friend.  Feel free to tell us about your journey of security and adventure.

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